First Working Artificial Intelligence (AI) Unveiled
Today computer science research has crossed a major threshold in producing a system that can be considered to display true intelligence. The system is purported to possess the ability to engage in conversations and even invoke creative use of language to express new and novel ideas. The system utilizes about 20 quad-core processors for processing speed while linking together several terrabytes of memory to maintain an active working set of functions. There is no appreciable delay in responses, and unlike systems of the past, this system displays a behavior that can only be considered "self-motivating" in initiating actions. Dr. Charles P. Unger suggested that perhaps this use of artificial intelligence still displayed many unresolved issues and clearly warranted significant future research. "Perhaps we should've focused more on artificial personality rather than intelligence, because this system is particularly cranky!." After a grueling morning of questions and intense conversations, the research team responsible for this development is relieved that the system has finally "shut up". "Nothing was good enough and we were all dolts," according to an account by one of the researchers who has chosen to remain anonymous. "Left up to me, I'd unplug the bloody thing". Despite their overwhelming success, the team isn't sure whether anyone can tolerate being in the same room with this system long enough to validate their results.