San Francisco, always at the avant-garde
of kooky, pointless gestures that annoy many and help few, thinks the worst problem it faces today are 'impulse' buys of goldfish, so they want to ban them.
Gotta put an end to the inhumane conditions perpetuated by the Big Goldfish military-industrial complex; their homes are completely underwater and they only get fed once a day. Meanwhile, the pollution and slave labor of Apple barely gets noticed. It helps that few activists own goldfish but all of them own iPhones.