Humor

The Authentic Biography OF H2O

as told exclusively to this author


Thanks to its marvellous memory, water tells some tales of its adventures down through the ages.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/0/0c/FoggDam-NT.jpg/320px-FoggDam-NT.jpg
Is Google On The Level?

I have often complained about the way that Google search behaves.  For instance, try looking up the capacitance of a lead-acid battery.  Good luck with that - Google positively insists that you ought to want to search for capacity.
This is another of my poems for children of all ages.

It is very fortunate for me that the grammar police have never been issued with tazers.
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Paddles At The Beachside

The rains is gone
the sand are dry
The sun is shone
the bird is fly.

The wavies flow
just like heart beat
I think we go
and paddle our feet.




Image courtesy: Trevor Edwards (Lucky Trev) Sheppey Pictures And Postcards.

With the popularity of dark matter and dark energy as blanket terms for 'this is weird and we don't understand it but we are studying it, ain't science awesome?' in physics, it was only a matter of time before it caught on elsewhere.

So we have dark lightning and the life sciences made sure they caught the wave, migrating non-coding DNA (factual = booooring) from the colloquially misunderstood blanket term 'junk DNA' to the cooler and edgier 21st century 'Dark Genome'.


What is the optimum stroke angle for a duck’s foot when paddling? 

Although a duck may already intuitively know the answer, the question has now been clarified for us humans as part of a recent research project undertaken at the prestigious California Institute of Technology (Caltech), in the US.

Research Scientist and Post Doctoral Scholar Dr. Daegyoum Kim performed the study along with professor Morteza Gharib. The team employed a range of experimental setups with mechanical flappers, clappers and paddlers in tanks of fluid which was seeded with silver-coated glass microspheres and illuminated by an Nd:YAG laser.
The Windows® NTFS disk filing system was first introduced in 1993, but despite its undoubted sophistication, not everyone is convinced that it is perfectly tuned for all possible eventualities. Prompting Dr. Fanglu Guo and Dr. Tzi-cker Chiueh from Symantec Research. Laboratories, Culver City, USA to develop their DAFT disk operating system.
Would one normally expect a health-professional’s stethoscope to hang more predominantly to their left, or their right? And if there is a bias, what conclusions may be drawn? In 2007, professor Emmanuel Stylianos Antonarakis MBBCh performed a cross-sectional questionnaire survey with 186 medical doctors of all grades from the University Hospital of Wales, Cardiff. The prevalent stethoscope-hang side (if there was one) was noted and correlated with handedness, footedness, eyedness, earedness, hand clasping, arm folding, and leg crossing of the subjects.
Typical Male ?

Just for fun:


What else might Nicholas Cage be saying?  There's plenty of scope here for your ideas.
What makes adult human males attractive (to adult human females) ? Of the many possible factors, at least three have been scientifically investigated, measured, and described by ‘Honest Signals’ researcher Dr. Nick Neave, of the School of Life Sciences, Department of Psychology, at Northumbria University, Newcastle upon Tyne, UK.

Factor one: Facial hair (of the right length)

“A within-subjects design employed one condition (facial hair) incorporating five levels (clean-shaven, light stubble, heavy stubble, light beard and full beard).”

Many may jump to the conclusion that ‘Uninformative Advertising’ simply provides a route by which a manufacturing corporation can ‘burn its money’ – but this may not always be the case, as explained in a recent paper from the Yale School of Management.

 Professors Dina Mayzlin and Jiwoong Shin have identified ways in which advertising that is deliberately devoid of any attribute information can (sometimes) help to promote sales.