Humor

“The modern drive towards mobility and wireless devices is motivating intensive research in energy harvesting technologies.” say two research fellows at Cranfield University in the UK, who are  currently examining the question – ‘Why not harvest energy from people’s knees?’

Before continuing, please bear in mind that :

“The opinions or assertions contained herein are the private views of the authors and are not to be construed as official or as reflecting the views of the US Department of the Army, the US Department of Defense, the Department of the Navy or naval services at large.”

There are currently a number of research teams worldwide working towards the implementation of bionic heads and faces which can attempt to express human emotions, however “… most of them can not express continuous changing expressions effectively, and they just express limited pre-existing emotional state.” explain the developers of a new Chinese Bionic Head.

“Previous studies of slithering have rested on the assumption that snakes slither by pushing laterally against rocks and branches.” explain a joint research team from the Applied Mathematics Laboratory, Courant Institute of Mathematical Sciences, of New York University and the Departments of Mechanical Engineering and Biology, at the Georgia Institute of Technology.
The funniest thing I have read lately.

Ben Elton's new Britcom 'The Wright Way' has been panned by critics.  It is about a health and safety team in the fictitious borough of Baselricky.

One review I read, by The Guardian's Charlie Brooker, makes mock of 'The Wright Way' and then goes on to wax lyrical about 'elf n'safety' in general.  It is a very good read: I literally laughed out loud.
One of the major criticisms of The Wright Way, apart from the title and scripting and performances and set design and soundtrack and ambience and positioning of each individual pixel making up the overall image, is the main character's chosen career.

...

The well-known moral dilemma about sacrificing a few to save many has now been answered by extraction of empirical data from conceivable parallel worlds via obvious-operators instantiated in neural networks that were tuned by evolutionary algorithms into weak quantum measurement of counterfactuals. The scientists came up with an intriguing variation of the traditional setup:

There are three gondolas suspended from cables over an abyss, all attached to one main beam which will break soon if not at least one gondola’s cable is cut.

The gondolas are prepared as follows:

The Authentic Biography OF H2O

as told exclusively to this author


Thanks to its marvellous memory, water tells some tales of its adventures down through the ages.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/0/0c/FoggDam-NT.jpg/320px-FoggDam-NT.jpg
Is Google On The Level?

I have often complained about the way that Google search behaves.  For instance, try looking up the capacitance of a lead-acid battery.  Good luck with that - Google positively insists that you ought to want to search for capacity.
This is another of my poems for children of all ages.

It is very fortunate for me that the grammar police have never been issued with tazers.
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Paddles At The Beachside

The rains is gone
the sand are dry
The sun is shone
the bird is fly.

The wavies flow
just like heart beat
I think we go
and paddle our feet.




Image courtesy: Trevor Edwards (Lucky Trev) Sheppey Pictures And Postcards.

With the popularity of dark matter and dark energy as blanket terms for 'this is weird and we don't understand it but we are studying it, ain't science awesome?' in physics, it was only a matter of time before it caught on elsewhere.

So we have dark lightning and the life sciences made sure they caught the wave, migrating non-coding DNA (factual = booooring) from the colloquially misunderstood blanket term 'junk DNA' to the cooler and edgier 21st century 'Dark Genome'.